Beware this lyin’, cheatin’, deceivin’ mushroom! Not because it’s poisonous (it’s not), but because it’s trying to bamboozle us all by looking like an actual turkey tail mushroom!
Isn’t there enough trickery in the world already?
Anyway, as the name suggests, this mushroom is shaped like a turkey tail or like a fan. It’s colorful with really interesting patterns, and grows on decaying branches and logs of deciduous trees.
Not to sound superficial, but its looks are kind of the only thing that the false turkey tail has going for it. True turkey tail mushrooms have medicinal uses, but false turkey tails do not. False turkey tails are also not edible because they’re super tough.
How can you tell an honest turkey tail mushroom from this sneaky poser? Look on the underside of the brackets. False turkey tails have a smooth underside, while the underside of a true turkey tail is very porous.
I find it really amusing that the mushroom-naming powers-that-be couldn’t just give it its own name, but decided to make it sound like a phony :)
Honorable Mentions
I’d be remiss if I didn’t at least point out these other cleverly-named mushrooms, so that you can keep an eye out for them too:
Dead Man’s Fingers (Xylaria polymorpha) – because everyone loves a dose of the macabre with their hikes.
Eyelash cup (Scutellinia scutellat) – this sounds like something your lash artist would use for storage, but it’s actually a hairy red-orange mushroom. It’s also known as eyelash fungus, which SOUNDS HORRIBLE!
And, my personal favorite…
Dog Vomit Slime Mold (Fuligo septica) The only reason this one didn’t make the list is that it’s not a mushroom, or any other type of fungus. “Slime molds” used to be classified as fungi, but they were kicked out of the kingdom, so to speak, and are now considered protists.
Doesn’t matter – you’ve seen it. You’ve definitely mistaken it for doggie barf. It’s gross looking and it’s everywhere, especially when it rains. You’ve been meaning to look up what the heck it is, but you keep forgetting. And now you know! You’re welcome :)